Cats and offal

In view of the previous discussion on the dining habits of cats versus dogs I was interested to hear, entirely coincidentally, the story of Thomas Hardy’s heart.

In the course of a delightful weekend away with merely my faithful hound for company in the gorgeous cottage of generous friends in Cromer (photos here) I broke the habit of several years and watched the television. From which I learnt the story of the cat and the biscuit tin. Which goes something like this.

Thomas Hardy wanted to be buried in his local churchyard in Dorset. The authorities wanted him to be interred in poets’ corner in Westminster Abbey. A compromise was reached – his heart was removed by a doctor, for local burial; his body was cremated and the ashes despatched to London.

The story goes that the removed organ was stored overnight before the burial ceremony wrapped in a tea towel and placed in a biscuit tin. The next day the doctor returned to find an open tin, a bloody towel and a fat cat.

Sadly the internet reveals a huge number of variants on this tail tale. The cat was his own beloved Cobby, a blue persian given to him late in his life. Cobby disappeared when Hardy died. Alternatively it was another moggy belonging either to his housekeeper, his sister or the doctor himself. The cat may have just snatched the organ from the kitchen table without having to open a biscuit tin. The consumed organ may have been replaced, for purposes of the burial, with either a pig’s heart, a calf’s heart or, best of all, the slaughtered body of the offending feline. There’s poetic justice!

That’s more than enough about cats. Here’s a picture of Maizy the salty sea dog to redress the balance. While we were away she licked the sky and reports that it tastes remarkably similar to the sea.

Maizy licks the sky

What do you mean, a dog would also eat a heart if it found it lying about, regardless of whose chest it had been removed from? Prove it!

Why you should not self-lobotomise

Because at some point in the process you will become unconscious and slither to the floor with your brain exposed. At that point the cat will come and eat it.

True Fact of Life, as the second-born has taken to saying.

This True Fact of Life was brought to you by the Cottontail Hour.

Small mind and big brain

An interesting day . I went to interview Branko Milanovic for the openDemocracy podcast. He was late. He apologised profusely. He said we would understand when we heard his story. We did.

He just missed a train on the underground. As it clattered out of the station the draught of air caught up his cap and blew it over the edge of the platform.

Obviously resourceful and unflappable he approached a person nearby and asked if he could use his umbrella to fish the cap up with. He knew it was pouring with rain, he knew he had quite a walk at the other end of his tube journey, he didn’t want to get utterly soaked.

The cap was swiftly successfully hooked and landed. Only then did the trouble start. The next train due in to the station was stopped and held just outside while he and the owner of the brolly were hustled away by some form of station security official.

They were both, including the brolly owner who had done nothing except lend the item in question, given a good dressing down. And, most bizarrely of all, they were told that they were not allowed to catch another train from the station in question. They were made to leave the building and told to continue their journeys by other means.

This incident seem an extraordinary overreaction to a deed which while not exactly recommended seems to have been quick, safe and successful, and the addition of the small-minded vindictiveness of refusing to allow them to get on a train at that station seems the act of a bully.

I wondered whether the treatment he received had anything to do with his accent which would have revealed him as being not British in origin. Perhaps an extension of Polish plumber paranoia to the London underground.

Branko Milanovic, as irony would have it, has interesting things to say about unease in Europe and the USA over globalisation, arguing that fear of immigration is one of two main causes of the dissatisfaction.

He’s also got a great illustration of the effects of genuine free movement of labour from football and what he terms the “leg drain”. Maybe FIFA should be put in charge of an global ministry of workers.

Twisting and turning

Have you ever, in an idle moment, thought to yourself “I must find out what the tallest isolated stone column in the world is”? No? Neither have I. But today I went up it. It’s a monument. In fact it’s The Monument, which was built to commemorate the Great Fire which destroyed much of the City of London in the seventeenth century. Inscribed in Latin at the bottom is:

In the year of Christ 1666, on 2 September, at a distance eastward from this place of 202 ft, which is the height of this column, a fire broke out in the dead of night which, the wind blowing, devoured even distant buildings, and rushed devastating through every quarter with astonishing swiftness and noise … On the third day … at the bidding, we may well believe, of heaven, the fire stayed its course and everywhere died out.

Inside the column are 311 steps illuminated by some rather sickly florescent light and stabs of sunlight through the original slit windows. They circle up to a caged viewing platform just below the extraordinary golden spiky mutant pineapple thing (apparently a “flaming urn”) perched on the top.

It was surprisingly crowded and whenever I stopped to attempt to take a picture in these less than ideal circumstance someone walked into the shot. Here is a rather anxious-looking young man coming down as we went up.

descent

And here is a valiant mother carrying her daughter up as we went down.

ascent

Continue reading “Twisting and turning”

Internettent

Something really weird is wrong with my phone line, and therefore the internet too. Earlier today it gave out completely after several days of the phones ringing like they had laryngitis and having insufficient oomph to connect with the caller when answered.

Now it appears to magically be back again, but for how long I know not. Two days until a phone-line -mending person comes. Two whole working days! Which means after Monday, dammit. Still, there’s the wifi café round the corner although staying there for protracted lengths of time means drinking even more coffee than is my habit.

I’m so helpless without the internet. Lost and discombobulated. It took me a good half hour to find the international dialing code for Trinidad in order to phone my colleague by mobile to tell her of my plight.

Utility = E x V/ÃD

Update – anyone suffering the curse of procrastination should head over to Dr Piers Steel’s website Procrastination Central where there is an opportunity to take part in his research online, have a formal assessment of your procrastination and some suggestions about tackling it. On the other hand you might have something else to do first. /update

I’ve been attempting to write a post but, well, procrastinating over it.

A University of Calgary professor has recently published his magnum opus on the subject of procrastination – and it’s only taken him 10 years.

Joking aside, Dr. Piers Steel is probably the world’s foremost expert on the subject of putting off until tomorrow what should be done today. His comprehensive analysis of procrastination research presents some surprising conclusions on the subject, such as:

  • Most people’s New Year’s resolutions are doomed to failure
  • Most self-help books have it completely wrong when they say perfectionism is at the root of procrastination, and
  • Procrastination can be explained by a single mathematical equation

“Essentially, procrastinators have less confidence in themselves, less expectancy that they can actually complete a task,” Steel says. “Perfectionism is not the culprit. In fact, perfectionists actually procrastinate less, but they worry about it more.”

Other predictors of procrastination include: task aversiveness, impulsiveness, distractibility, and how much a person is motivated to achieve. Not all delays can be considered procrastination; the key is that a person must believe it would be better to start working on given tasks immediately, but still not start.

It’s estimated that about 15-20 per cent of the general population are procrastinators. And the costs of procrastinating can add up well beyond poor work performance, especially for those who delay filing their taxes or planning their retirement.

And that formula up there in the title? it’s Steel’s

Temporal Motivational Theory, which takes into account factors such as the expectancy a person has of succeeding with a given task (E), the value of completing the task (V), the desirability of the task (Utility), its immediacy or availability (Ã) and the person’s sensitivity to delay (D).

Doesn’t help me get the post done though.

New Year's Day

The sky was a beautiful clear blue this morning, full of light.

blue sky

A benign beginning and much appreciated.

New Year's Day

However twisted the branch, the buds still push through the dried veins of dead leaves.

Much of the past year has been dark and difficult, so much so that the brighter bits (and there have been some) have often been obscured. But I think, I hope, there has been a process underway, a form of progress however painful.

New Year’s Day

The sky was a beautiful clear blue this morning, full of light.

blue sky

A benign beginning and much appreciated.

New Year's Day

However twisted the branch, the buds still push through the dried veins of dead leaves.

Much of the past year has been dark and difficult, so much so that the brighter bits (and there have been some) have often been obscured. But I think, I hope, there has been a process underway, a form of progress however painful.

Home again

And delighted to be so. Just me and the boys and the critters. Maizy and the cat were happy to see each other again after their separation. I’m sure Maizy boasted about her long country walks and her agility over stiles.

stile

Other pictures from Tuesday’s circular walk can be found here.